me, only better!

Taking Chances and Defying Gravity

2010-01-29T19:11:00.000-08:00

Life is full of uncertainties. Very unpredictable. Whimsical. Yet beautiful. Wonderful. Magical.

Take my hand, my cherished friends. And together we'll explore the mysterious universe. We're not sure whether we'll stumble or stand in this world with limitless possibilities. We'll make mistakes, that's for sure. But we'll learn. We'll fall hard on the ground, that would hurt. But we'll bounce back higher.

I don't know much about what the future holds for us. But together, as we hold hands, we'll take chances and defy gravity.

...Some of my thoughts as I listen to these beautiful songs rendered by the cast of Glee.

Taking Chances
by Glee Cast
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_GVlJoH-YM&feature=related

Defying Gravity
by Chris Colfer of Glee
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R-Cf8_f9g30

F*ck You Very Much!

2010-01-23T18:53:00.000-08:00

I was scanning a blog about the issue with the Ladlad Party getting disqualified by the Comelec when I incidentally read a comment by one of the blog followers dedicating a song to a popular columnist. Caught by its intriguing title, I clicked the link. Then I just found myself laughing all through the entire video. For the first time in mylife, I screamed with my lungs, heart, liver, esophagus, and all the other internal organs of my body out the phrase "FUCK YOU!!!" And to my surprise, I felt better.

The song speaks about the cruelty and meanness of the society to gay people. I'm never one to spend time stressing my brain out to think how unfair society is to us homosexuals. It crossed my mind a couple of times, but I never really dwell on it. Because I always believe that straight or gay, people will always say things against you. So we basically don't have to prove ourselves to anyone. I thought I was okay with it.

Until now.

Not until this funny, catchy, song released all the grudges I unconsciously hold with the bigoted views of our society. Why can't gay people wear tubes and skirts without hearing cat calls? Why can't gay people express their thoughts without being misjudge? Why can't gay people be married? Why can't gay people be themselves and be respected just the way they are? It's really bothering to hear somebody, professional and educated, said that gays should be happy society tolerates them. Such a fart. A typical bigot.

It felt good to shout those phrase. "FUCK YOU!!!" But after a couple of glass breaking screams, I regained my composure and got my centerness back.

Listening with the song did not only released some hard feelings, but also feelings of gratitude. I am so happy and grateful that I can accept my self the way I am and that I have people who respect me. While most gays struggle to fight for the acceptance and rights of our fellow pink-blooded creatures, I am here in the comfort of my clothes just enjoying the company of the red-blooded creatures I am with. I realized how lucky am I to be in a circle of people where sexuality is not an issue, to be with friends who know I am gay but do consider me normally-no rejections, no special treatments-just plain love and acceptance.

Yes, society is unfair, and I believe it will always be. I would still encounter situations where straight guys bully me for being gay. I would still brush with girls who think I am no beautiful compare to them. And there would still be chances where even some fellow gays will try to put me down. But thanks to my straight guy friends who are always cool with having me around, to my girl friends who always remind me how beautiful am I inside and outside, and to my gay buds who always support me with all my undertakings, I no longer have to go out on the streets and rally for my rights.

To my straight guy and girl friends, thanks for your love, respect, and acceptance.

To my fellow homosexuals whose courage and prowess beat the odds, continue the fight. I will always be here to support you. Just remember one thing. Be yourself. Be whatever it is that you want to be, regardless of what other people think. Be the best that you can be. Love and respect the way you are. And let the beautiful and magnificent you shines through. 'Coz you, yourself, is a wonderful creation made to perfection.

And as to some small brained, pathetic chauvinists, with twisted principles, I got two words for you...

FUCK YOU!

peace! ;)

Song title: Fuck You Very Much
by: Lily Allen
Video created by: steviebeebishop
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=03PnU27cWDs

Sunday Laughs

2010-01-03T06:23:00.000-08:00

I was reading our University newspaper this afternoon when a drop of blood fell from my nose! Now it's confirmed. English=Nosebleed. Hahahaha! lmao.

After I got my hair cut a while ago, I decided to drop by on one of the top bakeries here in Hagonoy to buy some pastries. I almost burst into laughter when I realized the sign board in front of me. Hahaha! I was so overwhelmed with fun that I even took a picture of it. Hehe! But there's more. Just as when I was about to leave, a woman approach the clerk asking if there's any monay available! Wahaha! The clerk's face was indescribable, it was priceless!! Hahaha! So hilarious. It really made my day! :D

Life becomes easy with all these nonsense. :)

The Php1000 Challenge Series: Day 2

2010-01-02T01:55:00.000-08:00

Today's the second day of the challenge. I've been in front of the computer since 1:00 in the afternoon trying to look for places to invest the money and doing my home works at the same time.

I already came up with an idea actually. While I haven't found the best place to invest yet, I thought it would be fine to look for a temporary solution. And that was to sell books. There's an online site that offers brand new yet affordable best seller books. The prices are 30%-50% cheaper than the prices of commercial bookstores. If I could sell books in our University with at least 30% interest, there's a big chance I could double the money in no time.

But here's the twist. I contacted the supplier to tell them what I have in mind and they told me that unfortunately the book I was looking for is not yet available. And they do not know when will they have stocks.

Now I'm still here in front of the monitor. Holding on to the faith that they would soon have the titles, or probably, I would come up with a new idea soon.

But this is just Day 2, anyway. :)

The Php1000 Challenge

2010-01-01T04:53:00.000-08:00

It was 1:53 this afternoon when I went to Villa Clara to visit some of our relatives. To make the story short, my Mama Diet (Biologically, she's a first degree cousin), gave me Php1000.00 as aguinaldo.

When she was giving me the bill, I said "Wag na! Binigyan mo na nga po ako nung enrollment eh."

She replied, "Wehhh. Ayaw daw. Ayaw mo talaga?"

Immedietly, I answered, "Joke lang! S'yempre ganon talaga muna sa umpisa. Hahaha!"

And everyone in the room burst into laughters. Hehe!

But that is not what this entry is all about.

As we were on the way home, I pondered about where would I spend that money. I thought about buying new stuffs. Maybe a shirt or a pair of skinny jeans. Or the backpack we saw on Penshoppe, perhaps. How about a shopping splurge on Divisoria? I could definitely buy a lot of unique yet inexpensive stuffs there. Oh, 1000. It is heaven to have this amount of money these days.

Then we arrived at home.

And I gained consciousness.

Would it really be smart of me to spend money on these things? I realized, instead of having this crispy piece of paper in exchange for a pound of wooven cotton and shinny bentesingkos, why not use it to make more dough?

So I decided to put myself up for a challenge. Here's the deal. Before the semester ends, I should make the money grow for 300%. Meaning, by the end of the sem, my old 1000 must become 4000. How will I do that? That's the challenge, to invest the money on the right place. Seems easy enough? So to add some pressure, I decided to come up with a reward and a punishment. If I'll be able to complete the challenge, I would spend 80% of the total interest on anything that I want. But, if I fail, I would cut my allowance by 30% for the next sem, I would not be allowed to buy new stuffs, I would restrict myself from the money left, and lastly, I would use the internet only for blogging and studying, no FB, no FS.

So who would watch me with this whole challenge thing?... God. Hehe! But seriously. I mean, it's not like I'll be cheating. Rich people don't cheat. Hehe! I'll be honest with the result, I promise. Every now and then, I'll be updating you using my blog.

Will I succeed?

;)

jm's Life: The Best of 2009

2009-12-30T04:56:00.000-08:00

Life is like a book. And it is indeed full of various chapters. Some are good while others are not. But once you read the whole book, you realized that every part, good or bad, makes up the entire story.

Year 2009 is just a chapter of the past 18 years of my existence. So many things has happened. I've been through ups and downs. And in betweens, literally. :D And before we welcome 2010, let me look back at the past memories that made a change and added some spice to my already wonderful life.

MY WEIGHT LOSS JOURNEYWhile most of moms lie how beautiful or handsome their children are, my mom loves to tell the truth. I remembered it was early 2009 when my mom woke me up in the middle of my good night sleep. She was yelling, "Jimboy, gumising ka nga! Yung mga pinagkainan mo nagkalat! Napakatakaw mo! Tingnan mo nga yang itsura mo! Para kang elepante!" She was absolutely brutally honest with me most of the time. Hehe. It was painful for me of course. But it served as a wake up call for me. It was then that I became aware of what I was doing with myself. I was so depressed then that I did nothing but eat and sleep, then eat and sleep, eat and sleep, and finally, eat and sleep. I was gaining too much weight! Hearing my mom said those harsh words, I took the time to look at the mirror and realized that my mom was totally right.
Watching on television, I chanced upon this local movie called My Big Love. It was a story about a fat man falling in love with his personal trainer. It was in the movie that I learned about the 5 steps towards weight loss. Step 1: Ask yourself. Step 2: Start today. Step 3: There are no shortcuts. Step 4: Motivate yourself. Step 5: Be happy. Inspired by my mom's brutal words and Tony Gonzaga's encouraging ways, I decided to finally take responsibility with my weight and my health. And my WEIGHT LOSS JOURNEY started.
It was March 2, 2009 when I enrolled on a fitness center and hired a personal trainer. Slimmers World Fitness Center was located on SM North Edsa and was an hour and half away from home. It was time, money, and energy consuming to travel from Hagonoy to Quezin City for three times a week. And the fact that I travel before and after I exhaust myself from working out on the gym, it was kinda afflicting. But everytime I felt like I would falter, I just looked for ways to motivate myself. I remembered every after a session, I would go to a Penshoppe store in SM. I would just stand in front of the boutique, stare on maniquins and imagine myself wearing one of those clothes. I know I looked kinda stupid then. And for sure the security guard was keeping an eye on me. Haha! But I did not care. It was one of my motivations and it worked.
It was also then that I took the time to study different kinds of diet strategies. Along with excercise, I also underwent on a strict low-carb diet. I inhibited myself to a cup of rice per week. I also avoided white breads. And even spaghetti, my favorite food, was restricted. On my weight loss journey, limiting my food intake was definitely the hardest. I could exhaust myself from working out on the gym and felt overfatigue, I really dont mind. But restricting myself from my favorite foods, that was like a mortal sin. lol. So while other people were indulging on tasty meals, I was in the corner eating bland foods. Mga loko pa nga kasama ko sa bahay. Sa harapan ko pa talaga kumakain ng masasarap. Mga naiinggit pa. Hehe. All the excercises and dieting was really difficult for me. And there were times then that I felt like giving up. But thinking I could finally wear a small size tee and skinny jeans, and to eventually bent down without my "kuyukot" being shown to the public, lol, I was able to get through it all. I was 235 lbs when I started this whole journey. My target was weight 170lbs. I did not get any 170lbs. I got 160lbs instead. :)My Weight Loss Journey is perhaps one of the most unexpected and one of the best things that has ever happened into my life. No wonder it took up so much space in this entry. Hehe. I was a fat creature since I was born. And no one has ever think that somehow I could manage to narrow my weight down. But I did. And I feel so confident. ;) If my mom hasn't said those words, my weight could have been the same.
I could still hear her voice echoing in my mind. "elepante! pante! te! te! te!" Hahaha!

CELEBRATING ONE'S IMPERFECTIONS
No one's perfect. Who is? Raise your hand and I'll slap you in the face. Just kidding. lol. For the past years of my life I was living with too much insecurities. I blame God for not making me as beautiful as other people are. It was devastating to know that I was not good looking enough, that I was not smart enough, that I was not talented enough, that even if I give my best, it was not enough. And it was more burdensome to have people tell that in your face.
It was this year that I grew tired of thinking what other people have to say. I looked inside of me and found that there's more to me than these flaws. And when I started to appreciate the good things in me, that was the time that I started to love myself more. It was then that I began loving my dark skin, my round lips, my big nose, and all the pimples. It's not that I want more pimples, like, "sana mapuno na ng tagyawat muka ko." Di naman ganon! Hehe. Maybe what I was trying to say is that I am now happier with the way I am. And not any blemishes nor a single pimple can take the fact that I am loving myself more and every square inch of my imperfections. :)

OUT OF THE CLOSET
Remember on the second paragraph when I said I've been through ups and downs, and in betweens, literally? It was this year that I chose not to be on the right side nor on the left but to be in between. Still not getting the hint? It was this year that I decided to proclaim the world I am homosexual. So in case you didn't know that yet, now is the time to be shocked. Haha. I knew since my dad's spermcell met my mom's eggcell that the rainbow blood of gayness is running through my veins. Growing up, I was distracted by how the society treats gay people, so I decided to hide my true sexuality. I had an inner battle with myself then. I didn't wanna be teased for being gay. I didn't want to pay money just to feel the love of a man. I wanted to live a normal a life, marry a girl and have my own family. Full of pretentions, but no complications. That's what I thought before. But the urge to be true to myself is greater than the fear of rejections and criticisms. That was the time I stopped fighting and just let my true personality shines through.It was hard for me, of course, to let other people know about it. I still was afraid of rejections. But the excitement of living the life I've always wanted is so intense that I forgot about all the consencuences. I am gay. And I am so happy that my friends accepted me for that. My family, on the other hand, doesn't know about it yet. But I bet they already have an idea they're just not ready for it. My mom still gets mad whenever I shout "ay puke!" She insists men are not supposed to have those kinds of expressions. lol. :)

NEW FACESI decided to go back to school last June of this year. I enrolled myself in Bulacan State University with the course of Entrepreneurship. It was definitely one of the best of 2009. I met different people and gained new friends. Friendships that I know will last for a lifetime. My entrep2A family, my mgt2C family, my pe-mates, my co-irregular, my jiggles, my strawberry, and of course, my sparkles.I also met new professors, to whom, with their accopmplisments, has imparted new learnings to us while establishing a good relationship with us. It is my honor to meet all these people.

OLD FACES
Year 2009 marks the second year since we graduated from high school. We might have gone separate ways and had our own priorities, but the love and bond inside Humility Family goes stronger than ever. And with every strict schedules, we always manage to have time with our second family. Every gathering we had all through out the year was absolutely unforgettable. But there are some that truly rocked the world of Humility. -May's 18th Birthday Party @ the Umbrella. Who can forget about that? It was a blast. Everyone was partying like never before. All the dancing and drinking, it was, like, we were from a whole different planet. The highlight of this event? People getting drunk and wasted. And guess what? That includes me. ;) It was my second time to get wasted actually. But my first in front of my friends. It was a strange feeling being drunk. It was, like, you have your own world and you're free to do and be anything. But after I became sober, I felt like I was the most stupid person ever. All the memories flashed back. I was aware I did things I shouldn't have done but I have no idea why I did it on the first place. I was so thankful that my friends were all forgiving. I realized that it's fine to look stupid sometimes, what matters most is that we learn from our mistake and at the end of the day, it's our principles we still hold on to. Tsug! tsug! tsug!:D
-Humi's Christmas Gathering. Oh, memories. No bizarre venue, just a simple room. No disco type sounds, just my phone playing Two Heads are Better than One. No tasty foods, just a bunch of turon and a pack of Marty's. No wines, just The Bar and GSM. Nothing too special, just us having the time of our lives together. Yet it was one of the happiest days for all of us. 'Nuff said.

A NEW FOUND FRIEND
He told me I'm his spiritual adviser. So I guess that makes him my spiritual student. Hehe. It was this year when we became close. We were friends before but we did not talk often as we do now. All this time I thought he was the one learning from me. But it turned out, I was learning from him as well. His strength in facing obstacles and his unique way of seeing things are so inspiring that you can easily be encourage to be the best that you can be. A lot of people have no idea that behind his laid back character lies a verytalented, smart and responsible man. He's definitely not just another pretty face. Because there's more to him than that.
Did I mention he was the one who encouraged me to start my own blog?

THE SECRET REVEALED

It was this year that the greatest secret is revealed to me. The Secret is the Law of Attraction. This was the best thing that has ever happened to me this year. When I read the book and watched the film about The Secret, my life has changed. It transformed into a better one, something that I never expect. I became a better person. And am happier than ever. My relationship with my family became better. My relationship with my friends grew stronger. I always ace up my exams in school. And above all, I started to love myself more. Basically, everything goes my way. All because of the Secret. ;)

These are just some of the best things that has happened this 2009. I would love to tell more but I guess the time is not enough. A few moments from now, we have to bid goodbye to a year that brought wonders to our lives. But its end is just a beggining of another year that would surely change our lives. Farewell 2009! Welcome 2010!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! :)

It Fits!

2009-12-26T03:49:00.000-08:00

It fits!! Yeah!! After surviving from a fiber inspired meal, after all the blood and sweat from exercising and dieting, finally, my clothes fit! Yeah! And my confidence rose from 0% to 101%. It was, like, Manny Pacquiao turned Tom Cruise. Haha! I remembered when we went to the Church for mass and I was, like, walking on a catwalk. To hell with some insecured eyes looking at me. I just flaunt what I got, baby! Yeah! Hehe. I know you're dying to see how did I look. lol. But I wont post any pic. Haha! I really wanted to post a photo but the bluetooth device doesn't seem to work. Arggh. I promise I'll post it. So be ready to see an America's-Next-Top-Model-Best-Photo-of-the-Week kind of film. Haha!

Bitay sa Christmas

2009-12-24T02:22:00.000-08:00

The Christmas Eve Mass in the Shrine will start at 10.30pm and will end at 12.00 in the midnight. It's now 6.25pm according to my computer. 5 hours and 35 minutes na lang Noche Buena na! But for me, it seems, like, forever! I haven't eat anything the whole day yet. Except for the two pieces of ripe mangoes and a serving of banana. Yes. I am on a strict diet since the holiday vaction started. Hindi na kasi kasya ung mga binili kong damit pampasko non. Hehe! Ngayon pumayat na ulit ako. Pero di ko pa alam kung kakasya na yung mga damit. Mamaya ko pa lang malalaman para surprise. Hehe. So let's keep our fingers crossed. Magkakasya to!! Hehe. At pagkatapos na pagkatapos ng misa mamaya, God Bless me, bitay mode na! Hahahah!

An Open Letter to Santa

2009-12-24T00:52:00.000-08:00

Dear Santa,

A few hours from now, you'll be flying from the NorthPole. And I know anytime this midnight, you'll be crawling down our homes' chimneys. Yey! Just in case you were not informed by your little cute elves, I've been a really good kid all through out the year. And just in another unfortunate case the mailman failed to send you my first letter, I am writing again to remind you of my Wishlist. Here they are..

FINANCIAL INTELLIGENCE. I am currently reading Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki and I learned financial intelligence is the most important thing to be wealthy. I want to be more financially smart. I want to be able to have money work for me instead of me working for money. Hindi naman ako muka akong pera, Santa. Hehe. Hindi naman ako humihingi ng pera eh. Give me financial intelligence and leave making money to me. I just wanna be rich. Who doesn't want to be rich anyway? Just imagine the great things you can do when you have all the money you need. And when I say great things, I mean good things. Keep this in mind, Poor Dad would say, "The love of money is the root of all evil." Rich Dad would say, "The lack of money is the root of all evil."

MENTOR/S. I know for a fact that I still have so much to learn. And having a mentor or two to guide me through my journey to success would be a big help.

BOOKS. Information in general. Gusto ko maraming matutunan sa iba't ibang bagay. I want to grow mentally so I can be ready to take the world and be successful financially.

Enough of all this stuffs for the mind. Time to be a little bit materialistic..

I wanna have my own LAPTOP computer. Probably a Mac or Vaio. HP will do, too. Sarap siguro magFB kahit saan, kahit kailan. Hehe.

PSP, Ipod, Touchscreen Phone, Portable DVD Player and DigiCam. Look Santa, the era for Family Computers, Walkman, and Cameras with negative films is so over. Don't you think it'll be smart for us to embrace new technology?

There it goes, Santa. Ngayon pa lang magpapasalamat na ko sa'yo sa pagbigay ng mga wishes ko. Hehe. Thanks! Keep making kids like me happy. Wishing you and all you're staffs there a MERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS!! Bye for now. ;) Maligayang Pasko sating lahat! :)

With deepest gratitude,
jm :)

Second Attempt

2009-12-23T04:44:00.000-08:00

Having my own space on the cyberworld where I can write my thoughts and share my experiences has always been one of my dreams. The idea of touching other peoples' lives through the internet puts my level of enthusiasm up a hundred times. And when that feeling of excitement gets to my nerves, all the wonderful ideas just continue popping to my head. Things that I'd like to talk about, stuffs I'd want to share.

That's why I decided a couple of weeks ago to start my own blog on Facebook. It was my first. And I had fun writing it though I know it was a little off. :D But for some reasons, my level of enthusiasm dropped and laziness creeped in. I just can't committ! I thought I was ready to show the world who am I and what am I made of. I was wrong.

But here I am again, staring on a bright monitor and pressing the tiny squares on the keyboard, trying to turn some thoughts into words. The feeling of excitement is running through my blood again. Thanks to a friend whose with pouring support and encouragement made me do this. ;)

Am I ready for this? I don't know. I'm not sure. But one thing's certain.

I AM BACK. :)